Returning to National Championships
In my entire, albeit short, racing career I have never been as stressed out over a race as I was over the 2014 individual time trial national championships. I had basically come out of no where to take the silver medal in the same race in 2013. That one race had changed my life; pro contract, sponsorship deals, media interest, invitations to national team events and selection camps. One race. 40 minutes. BOOM. Overnight I went from local racer no one had ever heard of to the pro ranks.
On the one hand I was ecstatic, I was living the dream; on the other hand, I was freaking out. I had been thrown into the deep end and was barely managing to keep my head above water. Yes, I was and am really strong and, because of that physical strength, there was a lot of expectation. Countless times over the coming year a plurality of people voiced there opinions, predictions and expectations of me and, time and time again, I failed.
Regardless of why I was not getting results, a year of disappointment had put a serious hole in my confidence bucket. More than once I heard the comments and rumors going around about why I wasn’t getting results: lacked fitness, poor bike handling, gained weight, over training, under training, mentally weak, 2013 result was a fluke……and that’s just to name a few. So the night before the 2014 Championship time trial I laid on my bed wrought with nerves. I knew that people expected me to be on the podium, and I felt like if I failed again I would confirm the suspicion that 2013 had simply been luck.
The next morning I woke up freaking out, running through a dozen possible excuses not to race. Then my phone bleeped with the following message from my coach:
Morning Beast!
You are crazy awesome and strong. As long as you don’t let anyone distract you it’s going to be frigging great. That is the goal for pre race. Stay focused no matter what. You are a stone cold killer.
Just focus. Power, power power. Continually fight for a little more speed.
Results are for chumps. Performance is for champs.
Enjoy the hell out of it
He was right, there was no point in freaking out and there was no point in fixating on a need for a result. Neither would help my performance. I took a deep breath, gathered my brains, and focused: What can I do right now to perform? A thousand times in the hours leading up to the start of my race my mind wandered, my heart rate would start racing and my imagination would conquer up all the possible disasters; a thousand times I stopped, took a breath and focused. What can I do right now?
What can I do before we leave? Pack my race bag, pin my number, prep pre and post race nutrition, clean my race glasses, set up my garmin, double check my equipment
What can I do on the drive? Hydrate, visualize the course, breathe
What can I do pre-race? Get changed, lay out equipment, bike check, warm up, visualize, breathe
What can I do at the start line? Set my computer, stretch, visualize, breathe
Moments later I was clipped in, watching the countdown. This was it. Show time. 10 seconds to go and an overwhelming wave of nerves and nausea went through me. With every ounce of will power I forced my mind to be blank. I focused 100% on my breath. Do not panic. Breathe. Focus. Go.
I exploded out of the starting gate, my nerves once again getting the better of me, and fought to regain control. There’s 29km to go. No, you cannot sprint for 29km. Keep it in your pants, get a grip and focus. Several kilometers into the first lap I finally found my rhythm; I was finally calm and focused. The entire race I spent fighting to keep that focus. Focus on the corners, focus on cadence, focus on breathing. Shut out the doubts and fears and pain. Focus.
Crossing the finish line I had nothing left, it was all on the course. My lungs and legs were on fire and my whole body was shaking uncontrollably. No matter what the result, I knew that I had reached my goal: I had stayed focused and I had performed. Moments later doping control came up and started to introduce themselves. I currently had the fastest time and was expected to be on the podium. One by one the rest of the women finished, only Leah and Jasmin managing to come in ahead of the time I had set. I cannot even describe the feeling of relief that went through me when the final results were announced. After a year of disappointment and doubt I had done it, I had made it onto the podium. All the stress dissipated and I found myself actually excited for the following races.
Big congrats to Leah Kirchman on her first National time trial title and to my team mate Jasmin Glaesser who took silver just 2 seconds down from Leah. Also, congratulations to Gillian Carleton who finished just a few seconds off of the podium even after taking the past several months off due to illness.
Over dinner we discussed the best possible strategy for the road race the next day: 130km including five laps over Mt Morne, a 3km climb pitching up to 11% at the summit. With three riders (Jasmin, Alizee and myself), we were equally matched with Optum (Leah, Denise and Annie). There were a few amateur teams with large numbers and a handful of individual pro riders, like Gillian Carleton, but Optum and TIBCO would be the dominant teams. We decided that Jasmin was our team’s best chance of winning the race and so Alizee and I would be working for her. The plan was for Alizee and I to cover Optum, and to take turns attacking. If any other team attacked, we would let it go for Optum to chase. Our hope was to (a) whittle down the peloton and (b) force Optum to work, ideally dropping one of their riders.
Rolling out to the circuit; everyone watching and waiting for someone else to take charge
Early in the race Megan Rathwell, the BC provincial champion two years running, attacked and got a gap. Sarah Coney from Trek Red Truck bridged up to Megan and the two of them started working together, slowly but steadily widening the gap. There was a bit of nervousness in the peloton but no one was reacting, everyone looking around waiting for someone else to do the work of chasing down the break. Megan, a strong climber, dropped Sara on Mt Morne and continued to widen the gap to the peloton. For 60km she rode solo at one point leading by more than five minutes.
Megan Rathwell off on a 60km solo flier. What a badass!
The climb was slowly whittling down the field, a handful of riders dropping off each time, but all the key players were still there. TIBCO would attack and Optum would chase; Optum would attack and TIBCO would chase. Anytime both an Optum and a TIBCO rider had a gap everyone else would chase. Between attacks everyone would sit up, looking around and waiting for the next attack. As for Megan, no one was willing to do the work to close her ever growing lead. Finally, the stand off in the peloton came to an end: Optum started seriously chasing Megan. Unfortunately for TIBCO, Jasmin crashed just as Optum picked up the pace.
Alizee and I did what we could, making sure an Optum rider didn’t get away without us and doing our best to hide in what was left of the peloton, and waited for Jasmin. Almost an entire lap later Jasmin caught us again but, coming up on the climb, realized that her derailleur hanger was bent. Forced to change bikes, Jasmin was left chasing the lead group for the second time that day…….things were not looking good for us. At the front of the race, the three Optum riders had successfully chased back Megan and so there was a lead group of about twenty riders coming into the final lap. With the front group together, Optum and TIBCO started exchanging blows again. Back and forth, attack after attack, but nothing stuck.
On the last summit of Mt Morne there was a moment were the lead group split, a dangerous gap opening up, but the descent brought everyone back together. 30km to go and there were still twenty riders. As the kilometers counted down, more and more riders attempted to break away but it was becoming painfully obvious that this race would be decided in a bunch sprint.
The final kilometer was all uphill and never has a single kilometer felt so long. Despite crashing, changing bikes and chasing back on twice, Jasmin still managed to take 6th place overall and silver in the U23 classification. Leah confirmed her dominance as a sprinter taking the win by a mile.
Jasmin takes 6th in the elite and 2nd in the U23 category
The following day was a well earned rest day. My parents came to visit, we went to watch Svein win the men’s road race in a spectacular 120km solo break, enjoyed a great dinner and took in the view of Lac Megantic at sun set. After two days of solid performances I was feeling calm, confident and excited about the criterium.
Jasmin had to leave before the criterium and so it was just Alizee and I on the start line against all three Optum riders. Realistically, I knew that I had about a snow ball’s chance in hell of winning the crit but I wasn’t about to go down without a fight. My goals for this race were to stay focused on performance instead of results, to be aggressive and to be smart. I wanted my efforts to count, to make a difference in the race. There was no point in attacking just because or being on the front towing the pack around in a circle. I also wanted the group to be as small as possible at the finish.
Focused on my goals, I put in a solid warmup before lining up at the front of the field. My first goal was to set the tone for a fast and aggressive race right from the start. The gun went and I set the pace for the first lap, stringing out the field and opening gaps in the first couple minutes. At the end of the first lap I eased up just a touch and crossed my fingers that the others would want to play.
YES! Someone attacked, I went with it then someone else attacked. It was a slug fest. What was left of the peloton was exchanging blow after blow making, unlike the road race, everyone was taking a turn. This was going to be an aggressive race. Alizee and I took turns covering moves that had an Optum rider but other than that we did our best to put the pressure on Optum to cover the other riders’ attacks.
Laying the hurt on from the start
Everything was going great, the race was hard, half the field was gone and then things started to go really wrong for us. Leah attacked while I was boxed in. I looked around for Alizee but she was too far back. Denise bridged to Leah and still I couldn’t get out of the peloton. The next corner was coming up fast and it was my best shot at un-boxing myself…….but it wasn’t coming up fast enough: Annie had started to bridge to Leah and Denise. All three Optum riders were now off the front of the peloton.
Finally in the corner I swung wide, coming around the outside of the peloton in full sprint and quickly gaining on Annie who was now halfway to Leah and Denise. I knew I had to catch Annie before Annie caught her team mates or there would be no catching them; they would put their heads down and team time trial to sweep the podium. Time to HTFU, I had to be in that break. Digging deep one last time I managed to get on Annie’s wheel just as the Optum squad all came together and started to pick up the pace.
The odds were not in my favor……three strong Optum riders and me…….just me. Not good. I ran through the options in my head:
- Sit on the back of the Optum train and wait for the sprint
- Attack Optum
- Work with Optum
The first option sounded great in theory but I was pretty certain the ladies were not going to be okay with towing me around for another 20 laps so that I could be nice and rested for a sprint. The far more likely scenario was that I would overstay my welcome in their break away and that they would then simply take turns attacking me until I got dropped. Second option would be suicide so that was off the table. Third option was definitely the way to go. I knew that working with them I had virtually no chance of winning but I would have a really good chance at a podium finish. Given the situation, a podium finish sounded great to me.
Confident that I was making the best decision, I started to move up in the line, taking my turn at the front and hoping that Optum would agree to work with me. Luckily they did and for quite a while I was certain that this break was going to stick. We were strong, we were working and the peloton was out of site.
I’m not sure what happened but at some point the bunch decided to cooperate and give chase and, with strength in numbers, they brought us back. The attacks picked up again almost as soon as they caught us but nothing stuck. It wasn’t until the final laps that there was some reprieve in the pace.
With three laps to go it was looking like another bunch sprint and so I tried to get on Leah’s wheel, knowing that Optum would lead her out for the win and hoping to snag one of the remaining podium spots out of her draft. Unfortunately for me I got tangled up with another rider on the bell lap, losing my position and being forced to chase hard. The last lap ran its course and I finished up a respectable 6th while Annie and Denise lead Leah to victory.
With the crit also in the bag, Leah had won all three National titles; triple crown! Leah didn’t win because she was the best sprinter (although that definitely didn’t hurt) – all week she was aggressive, she worked, she earned her victories. Congratulations champ!
ANIKA (the beast) TODD 